Originally posted at the lovely Leah Piken Kolidas‘ Creative Every Day, June 14, 2011*

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In giving birth to something or someone completely new, we have a chance to lovingly see our stripped-down selves, to meet the unknown with courage and agility, and to take a step along the path of our personal and spiritual evolution.

When we’re in the throes of metamorphosis – when change has taken over our body and whole selves — there’s a very real temptation to disconnect from the inevitable mess and chaos.

After all, birth is messy. It’s a very human experience: humbling, disorienting, sometimes sensory overload. (We’re not speaking exclusively of childbirth here; all creative births lie at the center of a similar labyrinth.)

But as tempting as it is to try to escape the intensity of metamorphosis, it’s much better to dive deep into it. When you meet the change and agree to walk with it for a while, you also open yourself to the wisdom waiting for you and deeper self-knowledge.

So how can you be your own best birth partner? How can you be present and fully conscious for the birth of your next “baby”?

Embrace curiosity and not-knowing.

*  Who are you being in this moment? (This is far more important than outcomes or decisions.)

*  What does this moment ask of you?

*  If you were courageous and you did know what to do, what would your posture look like? What’s the next think you would do?

*  How are you bringing your love to this moment?

*  What do you know for sure, in your bones?

*  What’s one small thing you can do right now?

Find your body. Come back to your breath. It’s a practice: you’ll come back to it over and over. Be easy, steady, and have compassion for yourself all the way through.

Worry effectively. Identify the worries that follow you. Name them, dialog with them. Are there ways to avoid the things you’re worried about? If not, how would you like to handle your most undesirable scenario? Who can you reach out to for help?

Find a rhythm and ritual that work for you, and stick with it until it doesn’t work anymore. Your rhythm is yours alone. Find the routines and rituals that nourish and sustain you through times of change, and promise yourself to do all you can to stick with it. Then, when your rhythm no longer serves, let it go.

You might have to do things you didn’t want to have to do. The wider the variety of possible scenarios in which you can envision yourself giving birth, the easier you’ll find agility and flexibility needed to change in the moment.

The intensity that it takes to get your creation out may be more than you anticipated. Plan for more, not less. When you’re giving birth to anything new and powerful, you’ll necessarily emerge a changed person. Understand ahead of time that your own rebirth can feel like a small death – of an identity, a perspective, old stories and no-longer relevant dreams or wants. If you anticipate the possibility of mourning along with the joy of a birth, you’ll be more prepared for the grace of newness.